Diane Bolden’s Synchronistically Speaking

“Intuition will tell the thinking mind where to look next.”  ~ Jonas Salk

I have been marveling a lot lately over the power of the internet.  I feel so old when I explain to my kids that when I was in school, doing a research paper meant spending hours in a library pouring over books and periodicals to get the required information.  Now, all they need to complete their papers and projects is a computer that has internet access.  The idea that you can tap into a vast reservoir of data, selectively identify what you want to read about, and have it delivered to your screen in a matter of seconds is truly amazing.  And now, it’s so commonplace that most of us no longer really think all that much about it – we just expect it.

And then I began to realize that this process of connecting to something bigger is not unlike what we do when we move from using logical, analytical thought to a more intuitive knowing – going from our heads to our guts. When we are in our heads, we utilize the data that we can see, feel, touch, hear, and taste.  It’s a lot like being in a library or using a computer that is off line – we only have access to the data that is stored in the immediate vicinity – much of which can be irrelevant or outdated.  And we often have to do a lot of manual work to get it.  We spend a lot of time trying to figure stuff out and make things happen the way we think they should.  When they don’t, we tend to get frustrated, try harder to get everything to fit, and ultimately feel as though we just keep hitting walls.  The frustration can lead us to cut ourselves off even more from our intuition, which like the internet, has access to far greater things than what we might realize.

When we access our intuition, we hook up to knowledge that goes beyond what we can immediately see, feel, hear, touch or taste. We can access information that links us to others – which allows us to feel connected to them – to hear not only the words they are saying, but also what they are not saying but feeling.  We can access information that is in the realm of possibilities – about opportunities that are all around us and what we might need to do to leverage and act on them.  We can also access warnings about options that are not in our best interest or will lead us to experience something that is not aligned with where we most want to go.  When we are in our heads, we are inclined to resist or overlook these promptings because they are not “rational” or explainable.

I believe that  our connection to something greater than ourselves allows us to not only receive data, but also to send it – in much the same way we do a search on the internet. When we are in need of a given piece of data, we enter a search term and then receive a variety of links that give us more information about that subject.  Similarly, when we decide on an overarching intention, like wanting clarity, peace, or a mutually satisfying resolution to conflict or challenge, we send a signal to the vast field beyond our heads that gathers information and energy aligned with that intention and brings it into our awareness. We access a field of infinite creativity and wisdom from which some of the greatest inventions and ideas of our time originated.

For some people the information delivered via intuition is easily decoded, like words on a screen.  But for most of us, it is delivered in the form of an inkling, a feeling or a strong prompting to do one thing or another.  Or perhaps it might come in the form of a sign or object that takes on increased meaning – or an experience that in some way relays information, like seeing a movie or having a conversation with another person that is somehow related to our inquiry or intention. When we act on these promptings, things have a way of falling into place such that our intention comes to pass.

Unlike our computers, I believe we are always connected to this larger field, whether we want to be or not.  When we acknowledge and rely on this connection, keeping our thoughts focused on what we want most in life, we will experience a sense of flow, peace and deep satisfaction that comes from experiences we draw to ourselves that match those thoughts. When we fail to recognize the power of this connection, and allow our minds to become consumed with frustration, doubt, anxiety and fear, this same dynamic seems to draw to us additional data, experiences and challenges that match our state of mind – and we find ourselves mired deeper and deeper in frustration.

So the next time you catch yourself feeling anxious  or stressed about anything – frustrated over not being able to solve a problem, resolve a conflict, address an emerging issue or challenge – make a conscious decision to move from your head to your gut, and then balance the two.   Decide what you want to experience and let that be your guiding intention. Your gut intuition will allow you access to ideas and possibilities that are just outside the boundaries of your mind, and your head will help you process and act on that information in a way that brings you the results you desire.

Copyright Synchronistics Coaching & Consulting 2010.  All rights reserved.

If you liked this post, you may enjoy other articles written about Boosting Creativity, Productivity & Effectiveness. Download these and others for free at www.DianeBolden.com/solutions.  While you are there, you can subscribe to receive a new feature article each month.  You will also receive my free report on 10 Traps Leaders Unwittingly Create for Themselves – and How to Avoid Them.

On the Verge of a New Chapter

 There is something magical about being at the threshold of a new year.  It is like climbing to the top of a long staircase to find ourselves on a landing, standing before a large glimmering door just waiting to be opened.  As we look down, we realize how far we have climbed to get here.  Yet we cannot help but wonder what lies behind the door. 

 Often we underestimate the amount of growth we have achieved until we take some time to reflect on the unique combination of experiences we have had that led to both successes and disappointments and what we have learned from them.  I often work with people who feel they are ready for a change, but aren’t sure what that change should be.  They aren’t necessarily miserable in their jobs or other areas of their lives – they just long for something that will fill them up in ways they haven’t been fulfilled in the past. 

 When I coach people who feel this way, they often want me to tell them what the next best step is – give them the answer, or perhaps a step by step process that will lead them to find what they seek.  Of course, no person has these answers for another.  Our greatest challenge and opportunity is to find them for ourselves. 

 I firmly believe that each of our lives has a story with perfect order and meaning.  As within a novel or a screen play, each character has a specific relationship to the main character and every scene has some relevance to his growth and evolution. There will be victories and disappointments, as well as twists and turns that transition us from one to another and back again.  We will have occasion to laugh, cry and experience a myriad of other emotions that are somewhere in between.  And as a result of this perfect combination of events and mini plots, we discover ourselves to be better people.

 When we are reading a book or watching a movie, the perfect order is often easier for us to see than it is for the characters enmeshed in the stories we are watching.  Yet the mystery and intrigue, the humor over each misstep and the courage we see the characters exude to find their way give substance to the story and allow us to leave the book or the theatre feeling moved or inspired in some way.

 As you look over the previous year, see if you can identify the most pivotal turns your story has taken.  What did you learn from them?  Think about your character sketch.  What are the endearing qualities you have that make you unique and special?  How can you leverage them to build on the previous events to create a story worth telling?

 Think also about the people that surround you.  In what ways are they helping you grow?  What are they teaching you about yourself – whether in joyful or painful ways?  And what are the qualities they possess that are similar to and different than yours?  How do you compliment each other, and what might it be that you can create together?

 As you sit at the threshold of another chapter in your story, contemplate what you you have already experienced and ask yourself how you might build upon it to add a bit of intrigue and adventure.  Identify the ways that you could add a little lightness and humor. Think about the interplay between the characters and how you could spice things up a little. 

 We have each been given the makings of a beautiful tale.  Open your eyes and survey them the way you would the perfectly planned detail of your favorite movie or novel.  Give yourself completely to the adventure, the possibilities, and the humor in your life. Then find a way to revel in the joy of living it.

 Happy New Year to all!  Wishing you all a bright, beautiful 2010.

Copyright Synchronistics Coaching & Consulting 2009.  All rights reserved.

 If you liked this post, you may also enjoy Life’s Perfect Classroom and In the Flow.  Download these and other articles for free at www.DianeBolden.com/articles.  While you are there, you can subscribe to receive a new feature article each month.  You will also receive my free report on 10 Traps Leaders Unwittingly Create for Themselves – and How to Avoid Them.

Space for Things to Come

Today is the last day of school before my kids will be home for two weeks of vacation.  I happily managed to clear my schedule for the next couple of weeks to enjoy them and the holidays.  As I write this, I have exactly three hours before their voices and laughter fill the house (which will inevitably give way to screams, whining and crying as soon as one of my three kids teases, taunts or takes something from another of them.)  I sit looking around my kitchen at dishes that need to be done, papers that must be reviewed, clutter that must be dealt with, presents that need wrapping and a whole host of unfinished business I’d like to have closure on before my attention becomes engulfed in the whirlwind that will arrive with my children.

Earlier today I lingered longer than I should have wistfully staring at bubble baths, lotions and scented candles whose labels promised clarity, relaxation and serenity – as though there really were a product that could create and sustain those states of mind.  It can all feel so overwhelming.  Along with the joy and merriment of the season come a few more balls thrown in the air that we all get to juggle along with those that are already in play.  It’s no wonder so many think of Christmas as a stressful season!   Over the next week, between last minute shopping, wrapping presents, building our traditional gingerbread house and begging and pleading with my kids to clean up after themselves, there is also a need to clear some space for what will soon be coming in.

In exactly a week, the pretty paper and shiny ribbons will give way to new things that eventually need to be put away – toys, clothes, gadgets and gizmos.  I’ve come to realize that my biggest challenge with keeping things organized and clutter free is finding a place for everything and ensuring that it all returns there when not in use anymore.  But before that can happen, the older stuff that has been outgrown or become obsolete must be removed.  As my husband often fondly reiterates, what we need is not more places to store our stuff – but less stuff.

Perhaps the same can be said for that which takes up space in our heads.  My state of overwhelm is as much a product of all the ideas and possibilities swirling around in my head and my heart that have no place to land yet, as it is all the physical clutter that surrounds me.  And my desire for serenity, clarity and order is more of a reflection of what I need to create for myself than anything else.  Doing so will require me to sort through more than just papers and possessions.   

As 2009 comes to a close, we do well not only to dream and conceptualize about what we want to create, do, have or be in the coming year – but also to identify what we can let go of to allow room for those things to come in.  To truly ring in the New Year and all it will bring, we need to contemplate our old ideas and beliefs about who we really are and what we are capable of.  Anything that is not aligned with where we want to go next must be challenged and released.  And we must loosen our grips on anything whose time has passed, as it is difficult to receive with clenched fists.

May the coming days and weeks find you intensely aware of and deeply connected to the beautiful changes that are unfolding all around you – and within you.   As the threshold of the New Year approaches, let us celebrate all that we have learned, created and achieved and begin to create ample space for all that we are becoming.

Copyright Synchronistics Coaching & Consulting 2009.  All rights reserved.

If you liked this post, you may also enjoy Room to Grow and Changing Tides.  Download these and other articles for free at www.DianeBolden.com/articles.  While you are there, you can subscribe to receive a new feature article each month.  You will also receive my free report on 10 Traps Leaders Unwittingly Create for Themselves – and How to Avoid Them.